Finding My Purpose

I've been married for 23 years.  When I was pregnant with our first, we moved across a few states and I haven't worked outside the home since.  That was right at 22 years ago this summer.  Our oldest was born that November.  Being a stay-at-home mom is what I always wanted to be.  Before my husband and I were married, we agreed that once we had kids I would stay home with them.  It hasn't always been easy.  We don't have extra finances for vacations, nights out...or anything really.  But it's a decision we have made and would make all over again.  I've had people frown upon me for not having a job, for choosing to homeschool, for working hard to homestead even though there isn't much money to be made in it (yet!).  My point is...I'm never going to please everyone.  The ONLY ones who matter are God and my family.

I'm a firm believer that God designed me to be a wife and mother.  To provide a loving home for my family.  I was blessed to be able to raise my own children and homeschool them for the past few years.  But I'm realizing that it's hard not to buy into the worldly thoughts and views about needing to have a bigger purpose in life.

Once all 3 of my kids started hitting the teenage years (yes, I had 3 teens at once and LOVED it!), I realized that it was time for me to get to know myself again.  I knew that once they all left home I would struggle to know my place.  I have loved being a mom.  It's hard to think of who/what I will be when the last one leaves the home.  So I started doing some trainings, coaching, courses, etc to help me on my journey.  Ultimately, I want to help other moms.  I want them to see the light at the end of the tunnel on those long, hard days with littles and know it's all going to be worth it in the end.  I want them to know and understand the importance of taking their kids to church services even though they feel they don't get a thing out of it because they are tending to the kids.  I want them to see that even in that situation, they are a great example not only to their kids, but to the congregation.  I want moms to know that the "job" they have as a stay-at-home mom is the most important job they could ever have.  Most importantly, I want them to see and know their worth in the eyes of God.  So I began my coaching journey with all of this in mind.  It has had it's ebb and flow.  My focus has changed along the way, but every time it's been about helping moms.

And where am I now on this journey?  Homesteading, cultivating a holistic lifestyle for my family and sharing our journey with others.  I've been learning more and more over the past 10 years about natural health & wellness, herbalism, decluttering the home, gardening, raising livestock, cooking from scratch, and all sorts of homestead related things.  So you'd think that with my kids getting older and not needing me as much that I'm all set and ready to go, right?

WRONG

My oldest is 21 years old and I have been blessed to still have him at home as a working member of our family (he's our main gardener!).  My daughter is 19 and just got married, so she is officially out of the house and on her own.  My youngest is now 16 years old and working on a horse ranch, learning every single thing he can.

Reality really hit me when wedding plans stopped, wedding company all left, my guys were all out working, and I was left home along.  Who am I?  What am I doing with my life?  Am I more than just the one my guys come home to?  The one who cooks and cleans, does the laundry, keeps schedules straight, runs errands?  Surely there's got to be more than that right?  Should I go out and get a job so that I can 1) contribute to our finances and 2) have a worth/value in this world?

STOP right there...read #2 again.  That right there is the worldly view creeping into my head.  Yes, we have talked about me getting a job outside the home.  But all 3 of my guys agree that I am best at home.  And I agree!  THEY understand my value as a wife and mom.  THEY get that if I were to work outside the home there is no one who can replace me.  THEY KNOW MY WORTH.  So, why don't I?

Now, back to the part about me being a life coach for moms and wanting them to understand their value and wondering where my place is now that my kids are all growing up...Here, right in my home, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, tending to the needs of others.  THIS is where I belong.  Why?  Because it's what I want...it doesn't matter what the world says.  And, yes, I can still help contribute to the finances in so many other ways.  Like the woman in Proverbs 31, I work with my hands, I sell goods, I am not afraid for I have prepared my household.

My worth is in God, in being here for my family, and in helping other moms on their journey. 💜